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JEROTICH: In a relationship? Here is what to consider before moving in together

If I was asked this question five years ago, my answer would definitely be, do not move in with your boyfriend!

In this day and age, who moves in with their boyfriend? When women are preaching independence and owning their space in the world.

How will women own this space when we always have to depend on men?

However, when I was recently asked this same question by a friend, I did not have a definite answer.

She asked me, would you move in with your boyfriend before marriage? And I honestly did not have an answer because I considered saying yes.

Let us look at it this way: Most people, who got into marriage and their unions collapsed, did not know each other well enough. They, perhaps, got into marriage quickly.

What ran through my mind when that question was posed to me was: What if I could not cope with the man’s living conditions?

I believe in knowing what I am dealing with before making a lifetime commitment.

And yes, some women will come out strongly and say, you should live separately, he needs to see you as an independent woman, also, life kicks in and after some years, you might get pregnant and forget about the marriage altogether.

Besides, there is nothing wrong when two people move in together and decide to cost share the responsibilities.

However, some couples make the mistake of moving in together just to solve some temporary issues, such as, finances.

Moving in should be envisioned as a lifetime commitment.

If you cannot envision living your life with this human being then there is no point in experimenting.

Nevertheless, in proving this scenario, why are there samples at a cake tasting for example? The samples are simply a way to know if the cake is good enough to make a whole cake purchase.

Can you deal with the fact that he does not cover the toilet bowl after visiting the washroom? Or he does not care about hygiene as much as you do?

Can you deal with the fact that before you moved in together he was always so helpful and romantic, but after staying together he just never seems to help out?

It is known the world over that people hide their true selves when they are in relationships. For example, as a man you might never see the natural face of your girlfriend.

But with moving in together, after a while, you will both ease into each other and reveal your true selves.

Therefore, moving in together is a way to know the good and the bad of the person you are going to deal with for the rest of your life.

 

 

 

 

 

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